Advent was a beautiful journey rich in lessons. Mining for resentments and handing them to our Lord was one theme of His schooling with me. He even dropped in my lap a wonderful prayer that I have been using. I think it’s from one of the seers I follow and who has the approval of their Bishop that receives locutions from St. Michael the Archangel:
Daily Prayer of Renunciation (Army of St. Michael)
As a Soldier who is a member of this Army of Saint Michael the Archangel, I renounce today before the Blessed Sacrament all hate or resentment that may exist in my heart. And to all mundane and even Family attachment, giving up all of it, in order to have a clean and pure heart and free from all ties.
Through the blood of Jesus Christ, shed for me on the Cross, I release myself from all ties of sin, hate, resentment or attachment to the world or to my family.
To be free from all of it, to be able to convert my heart into a ready heart, to be able to receive the infusion of the Holy Spirit in it, and to be ready to receive my gifts, charisms and final mission, for this end times.
I declare a pure heart, since, through the blood of Jesus Christ, shed for me on the Cross, I am healthy and free of all ties in my heart and thus clean and pure, I let the Holy Spirit work within it. AMEN
Christmas approached with some disheartening family dynamics and I was grateful for the prayer in preparing me to surrender these things to Jesus and not let them create any coldness of heart in me.
My mantra for Advent was a theme and variation of Michael Doherty’s “More Jesus” prayer. I added to it: “More Jesus – More Love Schooling”. This brought me opportunities that crescendoed into asking our Lord to give me Radical Trust in Him. Okay, here’s the Christmas story…
Through a series of odd dynamics, it was unfolding that Cindy and the kids were not going to be with us for Christmas dinner. And Gabriel, who loves to bake and cook with me on Christmas Eve and Christmas day was going to be missing in action. They were at least showing up for desserts Christmas night.
Christmas morning, I go to put on my trousers. I’ve worn these pants many times during the year. I reach into my right pocket and feel a little slip of paper. I take it out and it’s a Christmas prayer card with a prayer about family.
I did not remember this card. I honestly have no idea how it got there, and I would not be surprised if my sweet guardian angel slipped it into my pants. The prayer was perfect and immediately gave me tremendous peace and resolve to leave my heart open to my family and welcome them in whatever emotional, spiritual state they showed up in.
The theme of Radical Trust took a turn in my heart: “Undivided Trust!” Radical trust is more like a “one time” courageous Herculean effort – like jumping off an airplane with a parachute. Undivided Trust is like giving someone your undivided attention; our Lord is asking me to give Him my undivided trust in His Love, Plan, and Goodness. Our Lord lavished me with His Spirit and so when my family arrived Christmas night, He was there to greet them in me. Our Lord, so SWEET so present in helping us follow His trail of Love. A true gift of Christmas.