My ego has a hard time dying; vestiges of pride that want to believe that my head can tackle it all. I’m grateful for God’s gift of stories and sacred imagination. I know that without the fluid wisdom of emergent, moving imagery I’d be trapped in a cesspool of pride.

From Adam and Eve through today we’re constantly seduced by the idea that we ought to know more, be more enlightened, possess more knowledge, and be in complete control of our destiny. We cajole ourselves with adages like, “Why, isn’t it just a matter of time before we can understand life’s mysteries and know everything we need to be masters of our universe and in command of all things?” We have to quell these dangerous fires. We need to invoke the help of St. Michael:

Purge us of our God delusions…

3 Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”

² The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, ³ but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’”

⁴ “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. ⁵ “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
Genesis 3: 1-5

I found this tidbit of wisdom about arming ourselves with prayers to be a good reminder:

“Heretics are to be converted by an example of humility 
and other virtues far more readily than by any external 
display or verbal battles. So let us arm ourselves with 
devout prayers and set off showing signs of genuine humility 
and go barefooted to combat Goliath.”
(Source: unknown)

Let’s look at the life of Miriam in the story of Moses from the Book of Numbers…

The whole congregation of the children of Israel
arrived in the desert of Zin in the first month, 
and the people settled at Kadesh.
It was here that Miriam died, and here that she was buried.

As the community had no water,
they held a council against Moses and Aaron. 
The people contended with Moses, exclaiming,
“Would that we too had perished with our kinsmen in the LORD’s presence!
Why have you brought the LORD’s assembly into this desert
where we and our livestock are dying?
Why did you lead us out of Egypt,
only to bring us to this wretched place
which has neither grain nor figs nor vines nor pomegranates?
Here there is not even water to drink!”
But Moses and Aaron went away from the assembly
to the entrance of the meeting tent, where they fell prostrate.

Then the glory of the LORD appeared to them,
and the LORD said to Moses,
“Take your staff and assemble the community,
you and your brother Aaron,
and in their presence order the rock to yield its waters.
From the rock you shall bring forth water for the congregation
and their livestock to drink.”
So Moses took his staff from its place before the LORD, as he was ordered. 
He and Aaron assembled the community in front of the rock,
where he said to them, “Listen to me, you rebels!
Are we to bring water for you out of this rock?”
Then, raising his hand, Moses struck the rock twice with his staff,
and water gushed out in abundance for the people
and their livestock to drink.
But the LORD said to Moses and Aaron,
“Because you were not faithful to me
in showing forth my sanctity before the children of Israel,
you shall not lead this community into the land I will give them.”

These are the waters of Meribah,
where the children of Israel contended against the LORD,
and where the LORD revealed his sanctity among them.
Numbers 20: 1-13

The reading begins with the death of Miriam. Miriam is a beautiful name. I remember one of my math teachers from high school by this name who was horribly deformed by a fire caused by her heating blanket. We wrote her letters throughout the year as she went through the painful and slow process of healing. The third-degree burns were so severe. Even after lots of skin graph surgeries and a year of healing she had to wear a special clear mask on her face to protect it from infection.

Here’s what Miriam means:

Hebrew name of debated meaning. Many believe it to mean “sea of bitterness” or “sea of sorrow.” However, some sources cite the alternative definitions of “rebellion,” “wished-for child,” and “mistress or lady of the sea.” The name is borne in the Bible by the sister of Moses and Aaron. After the Exodus, she came to be known as a prophetess to the people. Source: http://www.babynamewizard.com/baby-name/girl/miriam

Miriam is a prophetess. She’s a woman of secrecy and wit. She stays close to her brother Moses in the Egyptian court withholding her identity; watching, waiting, believing, and trusting.

I love imagining an unabashed Miriam singing and dancing with reckless joyous abandonment when the Hebrews are freed from slavery (“To God be Praise and Glory Be!!!).

Miriam is zealous in her love for her nation. She is altogether human with her share of failures. She remains single in her purpose and even married life. She’s not really fond of either Moses’ wife or his style of governing. Miriam’s zeal for her nation casts its shadow in her desires for a stronger leader. She and her brother Aaron conspire against Moses. God is not happy with them. He calls them in front of His Holy of Holies Tabernacle. He reprimands Miriam and Aaron. He afflicts Miriam with leprosy. Here’s this beautiful vibrant woman – older now but strong and mighty. As a leper, Miriam is reduced to an outcast. Her tears of joy are turned into bitter tears of sorrow. (There’s that old joy and sorrow sacred theme – the two faces of Jesus ever entwined making clear what our path on this Earthly sojourn will contain).

Miriam’s brothers are filled with compassion and pity. They pray seven days for her. God is great. His Healing and Mercy abundant and always available to us when we repent and seek to bring ourselves back into relationship with Him. Miriam’s leprosy is cured. It is believed Miriam dies a quiet death shortly after being healed. And like Moses she will not get to enter the Promised Land. We’ll see in this first reading why Moses loses his right to enter the land. Let’s not forget though, its Moses who shows up with Elijah to bask in the Glory of Jesus – the Christ – The Trinitarian Godhead.

The scripture begins with the Israelites burying Miriam in the desert. The poetic imagery and symbolism is unmistakable. In the barren desert death strikes like a viper.

In the desert we face the blistering heat of the exigencies of our lives. Christ shines light on our Earthly tenure. Our time here will be more like a desert than the verdant pastures full of flowing milk and honey of His Father’s Kingdom’s eternal paradise. We’re like the Israelites on a journey. Intermingled with beautiful joys and signs of wonder, we’ll encounter more than our share of sacrifices, challenges, hardships and plenty of opportunities to get Lovingly schooled by our Lord. He’s the best Coach – lots of tough Love. Fortunately, He throws in some softer workouts in between the brutally intense ones. Clearly, our Lord is grooming you as one of His spiritual Ironman athletes!

God’s people are without water. We can feel for them. They’ve got legitimate gripes and worries. They’re stuck in the desert. I can see myself fantasizing about the figs and pomegranates. Short term memory is gone. They’ve forgotten the wonders God has done and is still doing in their lives. That’s us on daily basis. How easy it is to forget from moment to moment the awesome onslaught of God’s fierce, passionate continuous Love for us.

This woe says it all, “Would that we too had perished with our kinsmen in the LORD’s presence!” Their life stocks are dying and nothing seems tenable. Can’t we relate to this?

God’s track record doesn’t matter. “We have needs now,” the people are saying. “Come and take care of us.”

It had to have felt like a cruel joke for this nomadic tribe of Hebrews. Here they are without a home, without a place, stuck in relationship with each other in a desolate place and totally uncertain about how they should relate to this powerful unapproachable God.

I can hear myself joining the chorus of voices, “if God is going to save us and wipe away our tears than why should we have to wait?” In the mount of rising anxieties, Moses and Aaron do what we are called to do. They drop to their knees in supplicating, confused, perplexed, desperate prayer.

God responds with vigor. In the reading it says, “Then the glory of the LORD appeared to them.” (If I had more time I would do a word study on the use of Glory in this reading – because it’s a fascinating and powerful word here). We can assume Glory to have something to do with the Love of God. I don’t read the word here as Power. I think Moses and Aaron are overcome with the concern, presence and Love of God who is not abandoning His people. He cannot abandon them. God’s Word and Covenant are always True. He does not abandon the Hebrew people, He does not abandon His Son even on the cross (He dies with Him) and He will never abandon us.

True to form, God is going to make Moses be His hands. He doesn’t strike the desert ground with a bolt of Zeus like lightening and make a hole in the desert and fill it with water with mighty rains. That’s just not how God works. Our Abba is Mystery but He does reveal consistent things about how He works in all of these scriptures that we can confidently see at play in our lives.

We get to wonder in this reading, “Is there something Moses and Aaron should have done without God’s prompting?” Should they have known they could create water for the people in God’s name without going to God? Was their faith weak? Did they let the complaints grow too loud? Are they responsible for people’s failing trust in God? Did they become complicit in people’s weakening relationships? We ask these questions because, while God instructs Moses what to do and living waters are produced for the people, God also lets Moses know that he will not lead the community into the promised land God plans to give them.

“Because you were not faithful to me in showing forth my sanctity before the children of Israel, you shall not lead this community into the land I will give them.”

Moses and Aaron are imperfect leaders. They struggle in their faith and like us falter in their trust and belief that God will give them their daily bread. Here’s another word that warrants a careful word study: “Sanctity.”

There is something to the word, “sanctity’s” preceding action phrase, of “showing forth.” This makes me wonder, “How were Moses and Aaron living their daily lives?” What was there about their demeanor, speech, and hearts that had changed?

This faltering Moses is the same guy who has had conversations with God. Moses has been in the presence of the Lord. Moses’ face shone with the Glory of God. Moses received the Ten Commandments from God. This guy has gotten special Face Time with our All in All and He falls short in showing forth God’s sanctity.

I believe this is our Father acting as the Consummate Storyteller. He wants us to understand our human limitations. This is a huge treatise on our unworthiness and the Greatness of God. It’s a function of our fallen natures that need to be perfected, tried, fired and purified by His Love.

God doesn’t want us to go the route of the proud angels that opt to exercise their will and choose to focus on themselves and forget the selfless nature of God’s Perfectness in His Love. In the long arcing trajectory of God’s Storytelling He brings Moses to His very Bosom – His very Self at the transfiguration when He gives His Son’s apostles a chance to see the sanctifying Glory of God. Who shows up? Yep… Moses is there. God shows us His end game.

A humble and contrite heart God will never deny. He’s an Awesome Softie. Going back to Moses not entering the Promised Land but shining with the Glory of the heavens, is I feel, God’s way of reminding us that His deepest covenant with us His people far exceeds the earthly Jerusalem. It’s the heavenly Jerusalem that will descend from the heights of heaven. And I believe this mystery with its spiritual physical manifestation begins in our hearts. We have to become refined temples that can hold and intensify the Light of Christ that resides in us; where Jesus Christ is the Living Reflection of God made manifest in His human creatures.

The Coda of this reading is chock full of revelations and prophecy:

These are the waters of Meribah, where the children of Israel contended against the LORD, and where the LORD revealed his sanctity among them.

Waters that satisfy our thirst as earthly sojourners will eventually give way to the Living Waters of Christ. When Jesus steps into the Jordan Human History forever changes.

I want to move on but it’s worth noting the parallelism in the Matthew Gospel:

You are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my Church, and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it.

Here’s a new earthly rock. Peter’s profession of faith, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God,” is straight from the Grace of the Father. Lest we forget what it means to be human (Mathew 16: 13-23) we hear Jesus rebuke Peter when he wants to keep Jesus from death, “Get behind me, Satan!  You are an obstacle to me. You are thinking not as God does, but as human beings do.”

God sanctifies His Church with His Eucharistic presence. Having paid the price of His Precious Blood, nothing will prevail against His Love and our inheritance of Eternal Life with Him – not even the gates of hell. God supercharges our sacred imaginations. He grants us the graced capacity and power of a new faith and trust in Him. Our Dear Abba moves beyond freeing us as slaves and giving us land. He gives us All of Himself in way that has always been there but which is revealed more and more to us in time and in the flow of our storied history with Him. We are returned to our humble Holy place of being loved contained in Love.